Parenting: it may be the toughest, most time-consuming “job” available, but it is also the most rewarding and important job we could ever have. There is obviously no one-way street to becoming a great parent, but there are a number of things that enhance your efforts or acknowledge what you are already doing so well.

Your kids know that you love them 

The truth is that kids know they are loved when they are—just like you know they love you back, and sometimes don’t so obviously show it. You know those moments, when your child says the sweetest thing or just whispers, “I love you?” Make sure you let them know it too by saying it and showing it. There are a number of creative ways to do so—pack their lunch and leave a note on their napkin, alongside their favorite snack! The reality is that you can never show your child too much love.

You play like a kid 

Your kids are going to quickly become teenagers—and even when that day comes, they will have their silly, child-like moments. Embrace and encourage that innocent fun, and take part as much as possible. Parenting can be so fun, never forget that! A good way to ensure there are enough laughs happening in any household, start a traditional game night every week!

You are doing things differently 

There are so many rules to parenting these days, it seems. Carpool pickup talk may include: “You feed your kid gluten?” Or, “we don’t let Tommy to be exposed to any sort of technology so that his brain develops properly.” Good for them, really—different things work for different children so stress not if parents are making you feel like you are not parenting correctly. Only you can pick and choose the ways you want to parent.

You adapt to your child

Children go through different phases, and as adults it is our responsibility to be understanding and supportive of the good, the bad and the ugly. Whether your child is suddenly failing a class because of pubescent changes, or becoming argumentative at the ripe age of 13, do your best to not engage and continue to lift their self-esteem. Keep up to speed with your child’s changes and developments. Even if the phase is a tough one, another is surely to hit.

You say NO

It’s tough when you want to give your kids the world—or the latest tech gadget all their friends are playing with. On one hand, you don’t want your kids to be left out—or up to speed on the latest and greatest. However, saying yes to everything is really doing your child a disservice. Pick and chose what you think is worth it ad never say yes just because it’s easier.

You are consistent

Children are not capable of managing themselves, so if you don’t set the tone and rules, they will eventually be wandering aimlessly through life with very little direction. Make sure your set of rules doesn’t vary from day to day.

You take time for yourself

It is easy to forget about your little old self when a child is present. They need you, it’s true, but they deserve the best version of you. That means carving out time to indulge yourself in taking care of yourself; whether that means a relaxing bath or a visit to the gym. Never feel bad for taking care of yourself too.

(If married) you take care of that relationship

Just as important as it to take care of yourself, it is equally important to take care of your partnership. A child, whether you like it or not, absorbs so much about the way the world works, and that includes your relationship. Adult conversations need to happen in private. Date nights need to happen. Supporting each other and staying on the same page is essential.

You allow your kid to teach you New things

There is so much beauty in starting that afterschool conversation on how your child’s day went. If they don’t want to talk about their classes, because nothing special happened, ask about their lunchtime activities or what their friends are into. The best way to stay involved is to allow your child to share.

You do everything you can, and strive for betterment each day:
We all have our bad parenting days. Maybe we regret losing it after they didn’t clean up after themselves, for the umpteenth time. Be easy on yourself and know where you can improve. Don’t dwell; a bad day of parenting does not make you a bad parent. Tomorrow is a new day!

Parenting is an ever changing, developing effort; a “job” that doesn’t get rewarded so often. There is no promotion, or holiday bonus, but there is an everlasting bond between parent and child that will last a lifetime if you are committed. Your child is a gift; treat yourself and your children with the upmost compassion and love. Be stern when it’s necessary and remember to have a little fun!

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